Here’s our list of top 10 random hilarious jokes … Enjoy !!
Wife came back angrily in the house and said to husband “We should change our car driver”
Wife: “He drives too rough. Today he almost gets me killed”
Husband: “Darling. Give him another chance”
A crazy person calls an unknown number..
-“Hello, do you have any laptop”
-“ Yes. I have a laptop. who is this?”
-“Is the laptop open?”
– “Hold the laptop tightly. Otherwise it will run away” then the crazy person hangs up..
After few minutes he calls again
-“Hello, do u have laptop” crazy person asks
-“No. I don’t have laptop” Man of other side angrily replies
-I told you It will run away. Didn’t I tell you to hold it”
One evening a book salesman goes to a house and rings the bell
Housewife opens the door
“We are selling a book named ‘500 Excuses for a Night out’.” Said the salesman “You should buy it”
Wife replied “Why should I buy this book”
Salesman said “Because I have sold this book to your husband in the morning”
One day Tom Cruz was drinking beer in a bar very happy about something.
Leonardo comes and asks “What is the matter? Why are you so happy?”
Tom replied “Yesterday I was fishing in the river on a boat. Then Angelina came. She asked me take her the other side of the river. I took her on boat and in the middle of the river I said to her ‘Either you kiss me or leave my boat immediately”
She doesn’t know how to swim. And you know that in the wave of the river, on a oscillatory boat, kissing is too much fun and amazing.
Leonardo: “Wow. You are really a [email protected]!!!”
Next day Tom is again drinking beer in a bar and this time he is crying
Leonardo sees and asks “What happened Hero!! Why are you crying today?”
Tom replies “Yesterday I went to fishing again. In the again I met with a English girl. She asked me to take her across the river. I took her and as usual at the middle of the river said to her ‘Either you kiss me or leave my boat immediately”
Then she replied “What.. Just a kiss ?? I am not leaving this boat until I sleep with you”
Then she removed her wig and she was actually Justin Bieber
And god knows why but…
I don’t know swimming too.
Q: Why do some people tie bells in the neck of cows?
A: Because their horns don’t work.
Husband: “What is for dinner tonight?”
Wife: “Whatever you want”
Husband: “Pasta and soup??”
Wife: “We ate that last night”
Husband: “Then make some bacon?
Wife: “Uff… Children don’t like it”
Husband: “What about some vegetables?”
Wife: “Shit! You know I don’t like that”
Husband: “Then Sandwich?”
Wife: “Who eats sandwich on night??”
Husband (angrily): “Then what do u want for dinner?”
Wife: “Whatever you want”
A thief stuck a pistol in a man’s ribs and said, “Give me your money.” The gentleman, shocked by the sudden attack, said, “You cannot do this, I’m a congressman!” The thief replied, “In that case, give me MY money!”
Ross: “Your father still has the bad habit of slaying the slain?? Hasn’t he??”
Wife: “Why??What happened??”
Ross: “He today again asked me ‘Are you happy for marrying my daughter”
A drunk walks out of a bar and runs into two old priests.
He says to one of them, “Hey, I am Jesus Christ.”
Priest says, “No son, you are not.”
So the drunk says the same thing to second priest : “Hey, I am Jesus Christ.”
Second priest : “No dear, you are not.”
Drunk : I can prove it. He walks back into the bar with both priests.
The bartender (who was irritated by Drunk ) takes one look at the drunk and exclaims, “Jesus Christ.., you are here again?”
When Jerry was young he wanted to become a grand writer.
When he was asked ”What do you mean by Grand writer?” he said: “I want to write stuff that the entire world would read, stuff that people will actually react to… stuff that will actually matter to them, stuff that could make them scream and howl in pain and anger !”
He now writes custom error messages for windows in Microsoft Corporation.
If you like our list of random hilarious jokes, you can visit our category of jokes and funny stuff : Funny
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